"Design"
ACT THREE
CUT TO INT. READY ROOM-SPACE
KAHL, FROST, and SARA are in the ready room, sharing some sort of strange bubbly drink.
SARA
A toast to a successful conference.
KAHL (bored)
There is no need; I anticipate this to be…routine.
FROST
No such thing, General. Some of the finer points of the Tengu treaty are-
KAHL
You are Paul Frost.
FROST
Yes.
KAHL
You fought at the Battle of Starbase 621…during the Cardassian Wars.
FROST and SARA share a look. Where the hell is this guy going?
FROST (cautious)
Yes.
KAHL
And yet you allow a Cardassian to serve alongside you.
FROST
Mr. Muket is a Federation citizen and a capable officer. (annoyed) And even if I did have a problem, this isn’t my ship. Commander Lyons is in command-
KAHL (looks over at SARA)
A female. In command. (disgust) How…progressive.
SARA (attempting politeness)
The Federation does not discriminate by gender, although I know that the Klingon Empire has certain traditions regarding-
KAHL
Traditions imply permanence, Commander, yet our traditions are under attack at every turn so if I show disdain towards you…I assure you it is not personal. I am merely upset by what you represent. You and your Federation are putting ideas into the heads of our people.
FROST (angry)
Change happens on it’s own, General.
KAHL (amused)
And yet your Federation never seems to change, they spout the same ridiculous rhetoric over and over again. “Peace”, “love”, “unity”.
FROST
It seems to have worked pretty well up to this-
SARA has had enough. She taps her glass against the table.
SARA
That’s quite enough, Lieutenant, there’s no reason to get personal. We’re all friends here.
KAHL
Yes, friends. (takes a sip of his drink) This is quite good. Where did you get it?
CUT TO INT. HALLWAY-SPACE
WALSH and DECKER are walking through the Nelson to the transporter pad. This is one of the “occupied” hallways and it’s crowded.
WALSH
Why me again?
DECKER
Because you’re immune.
WALSH
What about Jimenez, isn’t he gay?
DECKER
Doesn’t matter, Orion pheromones don’t recognize sexual preference. Jimenez would be powerless like everyone else. (taps WALSH’S forehead) You’re bonded, it won’t affect you.
WALSH
Soprin’s bonded, make her do it.
DECKER smiles.
They’re at the transporter room door, it slides open…
INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM-SPACE
SOPRIN is on the other side, in front of the transporter pad. NERI is with her.
WALSH looks pissed. SOPRIN raises an eyebrow.
WALSH
You gotta be shittin’ me.
DECKER claps him on the back, hard.
DECKER
Enjoy.
He leaves the room, taping his comm as he goes.
DECKER
Decker to Bridge, the Orion welcome wagon is ready to go.
CUT TO EXT. USS NELSON IN DEEP SPACE-SPACE
A massive Orion ship drops out of warp. It’s an amalgamation of the Orion ship from
CUT TO INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM-SPACE
SOPRIN, NERI, and WALSH are lined up in front of the pad.
WALSH
This wouldn’t keep happening if you'd just let me get the bond severed.
SOPRIN
That has potential risks including brain damage.
WALSH
We could get assigned to different ships; we’d only see each other during custody exchanges. God that would be great, never having to see you again.
SOPRIN
I am just as displeased as you are concerning our mutual issue but I would prefer not to discuss it.
WALSH (annoyed)
Oh, hey, why am I not surprised? Once again Soprin doesn’t want to communicate.
SOPRIN
Your emotional instability often made communication difficult during the course of our marriage.
WALSH
My emotional instability? Don’t go there. Don’t even go there or I swear I’ll bring up your long history of passive aggressive bullshit.
SOPRIN
That history is in response to a series of irrational, often childish displays of emotion.
WALSH (to NERI)
Are you hearing this? Can you actually believe this Vulcan tripe?
NERI groans, taps her comm.
NERI
Will somebody get me a phaser?
WALSH has a snappy comeback but the pad starts to energize.
The Orion Delegation appears, including MISTRESS PLEXIA, CAPTAIN ALKAIR, and, by all luck, HADAR BARAN.
PLEXIA is an almost stereotypical Orion woman in the truest sense of the word, a scantily clad sex machine wearing a lingerie-like outfit and a long fur shawl. She’s flanked by two very pretty handmaidens, also Orions. Her consort, ALKAIR, is a big Orion man in Mediterranean style out fit. Cross Sinbad the Sailor with Star Wars and you’ve got this guy.
There are Orion guards. All of them are big, mean, and green.
NERI sees BARAN, fumes. PLEXIA steps down from the pad first, approaching WALSH with a sexy smile.
PLEXIA
Mmm, such a handsome ship. (to ALKAIR) Don’t you think, Captain?
ALKAIR (eyeing NERI and SOPRIN)
Yes, milady, quite attractive.
NERI ignores the leering and hands PLEXIA a hypospray.
NERI (annoyed)
Welcome aboard the Nelson, madam ambassador. Please hold out your arm.
PLEXIA stares at the hypospray.
PLEXIA
A hormonal suppressant? But sister-
NERI (snaps)
I am not your sister.
PLEXIA
Nonetheless, I would prefer not to dilute my woman hood. (slides a hand across WALSH’S chest, coquettish voice) Please tell her I don’t have to take it.
WALSH is not impressed. This chick does not faze him.
WALSH
Please hold out your arm, miss.
PLEXIA recoils.
PLEXIA (disgust)
Immune? (Notices SOPRIN) or are you mated to that long eared sow?
NERI’S temper starts to flare, she holds out the hypospray again.
NERI
Please hold out your arm!
BARAN steps down from the transporter pad, clearly its time for some diplomacy.
BARAN
Mistress, if you do not take the suppressant, then we cannot attend the conference and it would be a crime to rob them of your beauty.
PLEXIA
They want to take away my woman hood!
BARAN
Forgive me for saying, Mistress, but you are so much of woman that it would hardly dilute you.
NERI and PLEXIA stare for a moment, a battle of wills until PLEXIA finally holds out her arm. NERI sticks her with a hypospray.
NERI
Your handmaidens, too.
PLEXIA waves her hand and the girls line up, NERI starts injecting them one by one.
BARAN whispers in her ear.
BARAN
You’re welcome.
NERI
Fuck you.
CUT TO INT. WOLFE’S QUARTERS-SPACE
MOG, MAG, and WOLFE are laughing and goofing off in WOLFE’S kitchen.
WOLFE is cooking something, it looks like the Klingon version of a cheesesteak to put along side the heaping plate of squiggly gagh.
MAG
I remember the Battle of Betazed! By Kahless that was a fight for the poets!
MOG
Plasma bombs dropping from orbit, Gorn commandos at our back and Jem’Hadar artillery at our front! Glorious bloodshed all around! Do you remember brothers, how many gray skinned dogs fell to our bat’leths that day?
WOLFE
Actually I remember the Betazoid girls when the fight was over.
MAG
Ah yes! Women who read your mind and suck your p’ragh.
They start laughing and laughing and laughing. MOKAR, sitting on the couch, takes a sip of his chilled blood wine. He looks a little angry. The other three continue their trip down memory lane.
WOLFE
Remember Corvus Station? When they came at us in those little attack ships?
MOG
And we sent them home in body bags!
More laughter, MAG turns to MOKAR.
MAG
What of you brother? Which battle do you remember?
MOKAR stares at them for a moment.
MOKAR (quiet)
Ajilon Prime
WOLFE looks confused but MAG and MOG glare at their brother. How dare he bring that up.
WOLFE
I wasn’t in that one.
MOKAR
It was in 2373.
WOLFE blinks, thinks a moment.
WOLFE
The Klingon-Federation War.
MOKAR nods. WOLFE continues cooking, MOG and MAG continue drinking. No one says anything else. MOKAR has killed the party.
MAG
Be quiet, Mokar.
MOKAR
Why should I? We are speaking of battles…I was not at Corvus Station and I have no need to remember Betazed. I wish to remember Ajilon Prime.
WOLFE opens his mouth to say something…then goes back to cooking. This is how he deals with conflict.
WOLFE
Mag, check on the Zezarah sauce.
MAG doesn’t move. Nobody does.
Tight on MOKAR.
MOKAR
Ajilon Prime was not as glorious a battle, more butcher’s work then anything else. We were fighting colonists and stabbing the injured in their beds. Then when the Federation finally arrived we killed dozens of pathetic Starfleet landing troops. (Bitter) scientists and diplomats, not warriors. The regiment that I was assigned to prayed that the Federation might send the Marines, that we might see a real fight.
MOKAR turns to look at WOLFE.
MOKAR
I suppose it is good that we never did see a real fight…they might’ve sent you.
MAG and MOG exchange a look.
FADE TO INT. CONFERENCE ROOM-SPACE
SARA and FROST are arranging the room before the diplomats arrive. FROST looks over at SARA.
FROST
Did you get your uniform pressed?
SARA (ashamed)
Worse, I actually requisitioned a new one. I’m nervous.
FROST
Don’t be. I’ve heard this is the easiest treaty to renegotiate. The entire meeting is really just a formality.
SARA
Which means if we screw it up, we’re the laughing stock of the fleet.
FROST puts a hand on her shoulder
FROST
We’re already the laughing stock of the fleet.
The door opens and DECKER leans his head inside the room.
DECKER
They’re ready.
FROST and SARA exchange a look. Now or never.
SARA
Send them in.
DECKER steps aside and the Klingon delegation enters, moves to their seats. Then the Orions enter and do the same.
BARAN stops just in front of SARA
BARAN
Commander, may we speak?
SARA (annoyed)
What do you want, Mr. Baran?
BARAN
My mistress would like to file a compliant concerning her treatment at the hands of your doctor.
SARA
I beg your pardon?
BARAN
Your doctor forced my mistress to consume a controlled substance against her will. It is a sign of disrespect that will certainly affect our-
KAHL appears beside BARAN, slapping a disrespectful hand across the gangster’s shoulder.
KAHL
I see the Orion protest is early this year. (to
You’re correct, he was just railing against our doctor’s behavior.
KAHL
Interesting that they did not protest those treatments last year when the Nausicanns hosted. Or the previous year.
BARAN smiles, then shrugs.
BARAN
Never hurts to try.
That’s because I haven’t started hurting you yet. Try a stunt like that again and I might. (to the room) Ladies and gentlemen, please take your seats. I believe we’re ready to begin.
Everyone takes their seat.